I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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