Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
