Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
jump out the window naked night went bad
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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