when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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