It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
