Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
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