Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Randomize
