i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
