Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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