whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
