I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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