so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
