her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
