I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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