the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
