Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize