the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
