are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
