READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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