at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
FUCK WHALES
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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