If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize