you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
