got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
