i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
