Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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