This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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