please come you make the beer taste better
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
