i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Ladies don't puke and tell
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
