Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
home. puking in laundry basket.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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