when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Everything about him screamed your future.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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