i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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