i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
