Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I think people are normalizing furries
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
