4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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