Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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