i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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