I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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