Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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