you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
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