Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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