Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
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