hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
