Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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