I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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