so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
