Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
