we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize