I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
