How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
she smelled like a LAN party
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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