She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I just got carded by a ten year old.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
