areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
please don't ironically join a cult
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